Music, lyrics, wit, passion, and a poem.

I find music is the sweetest escape. The music, the lyrics, the passion, it's all so riveting and moving. It causes a stir deep in my soul like I can't even describe. Breath taking, awe inspiring, so powerful. Such beauty and grace, oh to aspire to cause such feelings in another one day... some day. Today, just today... music is the outlet of the inner core of my being. I can't even find words to convey to you how incredible it is. I love music.

Honestly, today is a day I feel ok being broken. I feel a release. Days like these come, days like these I normally hate. But today.. it's different, I know it's ok. I don't mind it. It's like closing my eyes to reality and taking a moment to just fall into my thoughts and mingle with feelings so tragic, feelings so painful, feelings so utterly miserable, but yet somehow refreshing. You have to go through pain to get to the pleasure. Tonight, today, this moment... I know by reliving such feelings it's reliving a memory, a memory so sweet and beautiful that it makes remembering the pain worth remembering the memory.

Dinah would have been 15 today. It's insane how fast times moves on. It's crazy how while moving forward the past can still hurt like it happened today. To lose such a sweet spirit is a bitter blow. Such a sarcastic witty fireball of personality, and yet such a compassionate loving sister. God, I miss her. Here's a poem I wrote earlier in her memory.

The sweet sorrow in the air,
It's breaking my heart,
It's just not fair.
To go on with a pasted smile,
Yet knowing all the while,
No one knows the pain inside.
The pain you feel of when she died.
The tears you never seem to shed,
She's gone and buried, gone and dead.
Life to death, such misery wrought...
So morbid a thought,
But it's the way things will be.
Years have gone by,
O how time does fly!
But the hurt etched so deep,
How your heart in turn does weep.
It never seems to lessen.
Cherish the ones you love,
Even the ones above.
Never let a day pass on,
Without sharing the love you feel,
Take each moment, take each day,
Never let them fade away.
This could be your one last chance,
So live, love, have fun and dance.
But even when your busy living..
The ones, the ones like me,
We learn how to live and let it be,
We hurt, it's pain, it's misery.
But to tear us down?
To always frown?
Nay, we smile.
You just never see, we rarely confide...
What's really going on inside.